Two popular Klove songs, songs I like quite a bit are "The Proof of Your Love" by For King and Country and "Let Them See You" by Colton Dixon. The lines have really stuck out to me.
"Let me life be the proof, the proof of your love. Let my love look like you and what you're made of. How you lived; how you died, love is sacrifice"
"Let them see you in me. Let them hear you when I speak."
My sons are the ones I need to be an example to MORE than anyone else in my life. Barking at my kids to get ready more quickly for events where I think I should be is incongruent with "let them hear you when I speak". Losing my temper and raising my voice when they do something/get into something while I wasnt paying attention is not "let my life be the proof of your love". Ignoring them so I can email or help other people because helping people makes me feel good and those people need to see/hear God's love is incongruent with "let my love look like you, love is sacrifice".
In the parable where the Master gave his Servants talents and the last servant had not increased the money, only hid it away. He said "How I can trust you with any, if I couldn't trust you with a little bit" (paraphrasing).
Our assoc pastor preached on this and everyone was probably in line thinking about money and investing- like the parable is about. But I heard something else. How can God trust me to spread the gospel and impact lives if he can't trust me with the lives he literally HANDED me to live by example to?
I write Facebook posts, emails, talk on the phone, or have people over. I desire to "be there" for my friends. I think it's important for me to be an example of compassion, love, forgiveness to other people. But am I an example of compassion, love, forgiveness to my own children? Why pray that God will show me how he wants to use me when he already made me the mom of these two boys!
I've been wrestling with a theory that I need to cut out obligations and stay home more. I dont like how busy and chaotic we are sometimes. But I really enjoy being out of the house, with people. And other women tell you that you need to be out DOING things! So your kids will be social and so you can reach/encourage others through fellowship. I really think that that "small voice" needed to be validated. my house and kids need me at home more right now. Their father is across the country, basically like he abandoned them in their little minds. They can't understand the sacrifices and importance of what their Dad is doing overseas. I can complain that I'm ALONE right now, I'm doing my best! But if I am honest... I'm not.
Im with them ALL day long, but I need to spend more time on them and with them. Alot of the chaos would disappear if the boys and I could work together daily to keep things up in the house, instead of deep cleaning it once a week when someone is coming over or I just cant take walking over toys and mail any longer. Alot of their attention getting behavior would be cut out if I spent as much time playing with them as I do instructing them.
I love my boys! and It's time I showed them God's love too, not just talk to them about it. I'm their example!
Now I'm telling myself:
"Let me life be the proof, the proof of your love to my sons. Let my love look like you and what you're made of by being an encouragement to my boys. How you lived; how you died, love is sacrifice and I need to sacrifice computer time, and social time to keep things less chaotic and exercise a sound mind"
"Let them see you in me, through my example and my temper, and my hardwork. Let them hear you when I speak to them, get angry with them, pray with them."
Likewise, urge the younger men to be self-controlled. Show yourself in all respects to be a model of good works, and in your teaching show integrity, dignity, and sound speech that cannot be condemned, so that an opponent may be put to shame, having nothing evil to say about us.Titus 2:6-8 ESV
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